A Mother's Legacy

Sirens blared and four pairs of small eyes peered out the car window, searching. Searching for a glimpse of the vehicle causing the blare. The mother pulled the station wagon to the side of the road and peered through the rear view window at her children.

"Quick, kids, lets pray for them," she'd say.

As one, they'd bow their heads - though, at times, a child would peak out, still wanting that glimpse - and the mother's voice would say "Heavenly Father, we want to pray for the people to whom this ambulance is going. We pray that if they do not know you, Lord, that you would use this incident to bring them to you. We pray that if they do know you, Lord, that you would use this incident to help them tell others about You. We pray for the doctors and the nurses, that you would give them wisdom and for the police officers and ambulance workers, that they would also have wisdom. We ask that you would not let anyone die, unless they know you Father. Amen." The mother's voice would catch a little at the end, working hard not to cry.

And all the kids would say Amen and the ambulance would have passed and the mother would pull back out into traffic. And ten minutes later the children will have forgotten it happend.

But repetition has a way of forcing memories and habits in a persuasive way. The children grew up, slowly, and there was never a time that, when a siren blared, the car was not pulled over and the mother did not say a prayer and there was rarely a time that, by the end of it all, the mother was not wiping away a quick tear.

Soon the children were driving on their own. And to their surprise, when it was their turn to pull aside to let the emergency vehicle pass, they found their own voices repeating "Heavenly Father, we want to pray for the people to whom this ambulance is going..."

For the Young Mother

I came across an article called, For The Young Mother: Ministry, Guilt, and The Seasons of Life.

I found encouragement and wanted to encourage some of the young moms that I know read this blog.

As we wake up each morning caring for the needs of a crying, nursing baby, a sick or cranky toddler, as we watch our children play and grow, as we discipline and teach them to share and be kind and obey the first time (we say fast and first), we can grow weary and feel as if we aren't doing much for the kingdom of God. We pray over our children, we teach them the gospel, we even try and make them part of the little time we have to minister outside of caring for them, and then we are riddled with guilt and an uneasy feeling that we are not doing enough.

Our society and our churches tend to feed that guilt and discouragement. It is rare to receive encouragement from the pulpit, a bible class, or even another woman in the church during this season of life. Of course, it is even more rare that the world we live in would encourage you to press on and delight in this duty that God Himself has given you.

Jani Ortlund, the author of the short article says this:

Guilt is a young mother’s habitual shadow. It has a nasty way of soaking through many of her efforts at nurturing, serving and loving others. “Am I doing enough for my children? For others? What do they think of me? What does God think of me?”

As a young mother everyone wants something from you—your family, your church, your boss, your neighbor. And most likely, you give way more than you ever thought you could. But along the way guilt nibbles at your soul, eating away your inner peace and joy. And it often lingers through the years, even after your children are grown and gone.

I would encourage you to go to the link and read her encouraging and helpful words to help you see this season the way we should and and live out this season of our lives for the glory of God.

Children: Joy or Drudgery

* Tomorrow we will give official word about the contest.

Now a post from quite a while back :

Motherhood: This is a very broad and beautiful topic. I love reading, listening to people chat and listening to lectures on this topic, there is a lot of good stuff out there. The Bible of course is the best place to get information in this subject. The Bible is not silent, it is very clear about what a woman's role is in raising children and celebratory in the way it speaks of mothering and children. So, when you think of motherhood, what is that you think about? What comes to mind? Are you inclined to think of work, responsibility, burden, sacrifice, more work? If so, you are not alone. You are not alone because it is true; being a good mom is hard work and it takes sacrifice. One person said this about mothering: "No job on earth takes more physical, mental, social, emotional and spiritual strength than being a good wife and mother. If a woman is looking for the easy life she might try teaching tennis, cutting diamonds, or joining a roller derby team. There is nothing easy about good mothering. It can be back breaking, heart wrenching, and anxiety producing. And that's just the morning."

Many mom's are probably saying “Amen”. We have all experienced sleepless nights, whether because we are feeding a newborn, have sick kids, or are worried sick about our older children who are struggling in this world.

But just because something is hard doesn't mean it is a joyless drudgery with very little pay off for all the work it takes.

In fact the Bible is clear that this task is neither joyless nor fruitless. But God knows our frame, He knows we are weak and selfish and easily discouraged, and He gives us Titus 2. Read Titus 2:3-5. Notice that phrase to love our children. That word love means tender affection. It means we enjoy our children, we are passionate about them, and desire to be around them and nurture them. We want their good above our own. You will also notice that it takes training. The older woman described in this passage is someone who is capable and willing to train others to have this kind of love for our children, because we get discouraged and lose this affection on the long, bumpy road called motherhood. That precious baby that you hold so gingerly and protectively at first, so easily becomes this energy sapping, body draining, sometimes heartbreaking burden. Why? Why don't we see motherhood the way we ,or if we do ,why do we find it hard to sustain the joy and passion we are called to? Why don't we “feel” fulfilled?

I am going to give you 4 reasons I think we have less than tender feeling in regards to motherhood. This is by no means extensive.

1. We do not meditate deeply on the love of God.

God loves His children, this is very clear. Eph. 5:1-2 says: Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma. God's love acts. Romans 5:8 says that He demonstrates His love in the sending of His own son for His enemies. He sent Him to die, to offer Himself as a sacrifice – a payment for our sins. For the sins of those who did not love Him. And Jesus willingly and lovingly gave Himself up. He knew no sin and was made sin on our behalf so that we who were far from God would be brought near to Him. We sin by disobeying and ignoring our greatest good- God. And yet, He sent Jesus to pay the wages we owe God for our sin so that we can enjoy God – the lover of our souls forever. He is good and those who are His get to experience this love and shepherding. He supplies all that we need according to His riches and glory. He nurtures our souls through His word and teaches through His Spirit. He disciplines us for our good, to bring about the peaceful fruit of righteousness in our lives. We know that if God gave us His only beloved Son he will not withhold any good thing from us. This includes discipline, so that we experience the ability to know more of His tender grace. Because even though His love is a choice, it is not without affection. Jesus wept over Jerusalem longing to protect them and gather them just like a hen would her chicks. This is kind of love we receive from God and the love that we are called to comprehend with all the saints. A love that cannot be measured. And this love that He lavishes on us should overflow to our children. We can tell them God loves them all we want, but we make it harder to understand and accept when we fall short in loving them.. We are the hands and feet of God's love.

2. We allow our culture to give us our view of children rather than the Word of God.

Our culture tells us that children will be a burden that isn't worth it. They hold you back from your full potential and leave you a less than adequate contributor to society. You are considered a large family if you have more than 2 children and a dog. You are expected to do better than raise children. Mothering in a sense is something to do in your spare time. But God paints a different picture about having children.

Psalm 127:3-5: Behold children are a gift from the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one's youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; they will not be ashamed when they speak with their enemies at the gate.

God says he gave you a child as a GIFT! A child or children are rewards! They are good things and a precious thing to have. They are not burdens and just a load of work that isn't worth it. This is God's good gift and reward for you. Being a mommy isn't something to be ashamed of, it is something to rejoice about and love. Children are something to get excited about and thank God for. And for you guys with kids, let them know it. I love to tell my kids that they are special gift from God to me.

3. We neglect to raise them for God in His way.

If being a parent is such a good thing, why do we see so many parents tired, ashamed and angry especially as their children get older?

Proverbs 23:23-24 say: The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice and he who sires a wise son will be glad in him. Let your mother and father be glad, and let her rejoice who gave birth to you.

You want to rejoice and be glad. Raise a wise son/daughter.

A foolish son is a grief and bitterness to the one who gives birth to him. Pr. 17:25.

So how do you raise a wise child? God says the rod and reproof. Pr. 29:15 says: The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child who gets his own way brings shame to his mother.

If a child, whether an infant and toddler, and young kid or a teenager is used to getting what he wants when he wants and is never given boundaries or these boundaries are always negotiable you can be certain to raise a fool. If your child lacks consequences to sinful and selfish acts you can be sure that you are raising a fool and worse than that the bible says in doing so you desire his death. And the only thing you can hope for is to be shamed.

So discipline your child while there is still hope. Do it for his good and because you love him. Give him his way and you will teach him that that there is very little consequence for bad decisions and there is little reason to have hope for that child.

Do not stop at discipline; you are also to nurture him in the Lord. Discipline is the first step and a continual companion to declaring the works of God to your child. (Read Psalm 78) Teach them to obey so that they will obey the gospel call. Speak much about Jesus in your home. Teach them the word and surround yourself and your children with the people of God. God's word is sharper than any two-edged sword. The word will lead your child to salvation. Talk about God and what He has done in your family and other's lives and talk about Him in what is going on in the world around you. Take every opportunity to point your children to the hope that does not disappoint. I find with my young children walks outside, sick family and struggling church members give great opportunities to speak about glorious grace and power of God. Discipline is an awesome time to teach about Jesus taking our disciplines that we deserve and teach them about the complete and wonderful forgiveness found in Jesus alone. Pray often for your child's salvation and walk with God. Pray in front of them so they hear your heart for them. God is the only one that can save. So plead with Him for your children and in faith train them, discipline them and talk about God with them because we know that this is the means God uses to lead our children to Him

4. Pride.

We love ourselves. Pride is self love- self worship. Pride says we are better than we are and makes us God's enemies. Pride is destructive and God is the one who destroys us because of it.

As parents or mom's to be, we must keep this in mind. Pride is a real joy killer!

Pride will say “I know”. Either out loud or in your heart.

Pride will cause you to compare yourself to other mom's and say you are better. Anytime you think you are something great, you can rest assure that pride is present in that moment.

Pride looks at Titus 2 where we are called to be trained and it looks around and says, “There is no one here who can offer me anything!”

Pride will make you a terrible student.

If you do not know anyone who you think can help you to be a better mother, you will be robbed of great joy and consistent tender feelings toward your children. Proverbs 13:10 says: Through insolence comes nothing but strife, but wisdom is with those that receive counsel.

Did you get that? Receive counsel! Do you surround yourself with women who can teach you and are you receiving it. Or do you think you know it all or at least more than anyone else around you?

Surround yourself with women that look like the women described in Titus 2. Not perfect women, but women who are concerned with honoring the word of God, women who are learning and working toward and consistently, though not perfectly, living a disciplined life. Find a woman who is willing to open up her life to you – warts and all so she can come alongside you and warn you off of her mistakes and show the wisdom she has gained through experience and the word.

And I would challenge you to work towards becoming one of those women. Pride will keep you from it. So put away pride and listen and learn.

To those who want to be listened to and yet people don't want to, examine why. Is it perhaps because you come off arrogant and critical. Do you feel like it is your job to correct everybody else's children when the parent is standing right there, because you are God's gift to parenting after all? You make it harder for people to receive your counsel even when it's good when you act like that. And it robs you of the joy of helping other women experience the consistent joy of motherhood. You will find that even if your kids aren't perfect and you have flaws you are easier to listen to because you are tender, kind and humble.

Moms, let's love our children. Do not let any one tell you they are a burden, they are a joy. Being a mom is fun, fulfilling, rewarding. But it must be done God's way and we must guard against the things that rob us of that joy!

So, meditate deeply on the love God has lavished upon you and see how God views children and let that control your view of them and this task of mothering. Be a woman of His word, motherhood is no excuse to neglect it, a in neglecting the word you will be weak in your meditation and therefore; your love.

In faith, discipline and train your child God's way, so that you can be a rejoicing mother; rather than ashamed.

And humble yourself enough to surround yourself with women who can teach you and listen!

And then love passionately, deeply and tenderly. Your labor of love will be rewarding!

Noelle

My daughter Noelle just turned 7. I can hardly believe that 7 years have passed since my baby girl was brought into this world. I praise God for every minute.

When she was born we called her Snow White because of her snow white skin and coal black, thick hair. She was alert and aware from the moment she took her first breath outside of the womb. She was just learning to talk when she told me that she wanted to be 'bellious. Her mind was inquisitive from the get go. She was fascinated with words like repentance and worked at learning what it meant and by the time she was two thought she had it down. One day after she was disciplined and I was talking to her, she kept turning her face from me, when I finally asked what she was doing she said she was repenting, turning away from Satan and sin and turning to God! Lol! :)

She has changed and grown much since she was 2. She thinks a little better, she's a reader and writer (she saw my book on 50 essential writing strategies and asked if when I was done reading it, she could borrow it... nerd just like her dad!), and she is much more self-controlled. She went from wanting to be 'bellious, to being sensitive to her sin and spending time in prayer and confession.

I am praying for the Lord to give her a genuine heart change that only He can give. No inquisitive mind can move a person to truly repent. I am thankful that God has given me one little girl to live out my life with, showing what a gracious and compassionate God we serve. I am thankful, and trembling at the same time. Titus 2:3-5 says, " Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored." I want to honor God and to raise up a little woman who loves God with all her heart, soul, mind and strength. I want her to know that God is her greatest good and He is everything. Maybe it's good I only have one daughter! :) So this is the prayer of my heart:

A little girl who follows me

A careful mom I want to be, A little woman follows me; I do not dare to go astray For fear she'll go the self-same way I cannot once escape her eyes. What e'er she sees me do she tries Like me, she says she's going to be That little girl who follows me. I must remember as I go Through summer suns and winter snows, I am building for the years to be That little girl that follows me.

~author unknown

Children: Joy or Drudgery?

Mothering is a beautiful topic that I find very interesting to read, hear and think about. When it comes to parenting children the world has a lot to say to us. The time and place where we live, our culture, tends to shape the way we think and how we approach motherhood. It is hard to escape this, but we must! Because we must understand and act upon the way God views children and mothering. God's word is clear on the subject; therefore we must become students of the word.

It is clear that God wants us to love our children tenderly and truly enjoy being moms. By loving, or enjoying our children we honor the word of God, we are glorifying Him.

In thinking about this I began to wonder why it seems hard to sustain this joy, this love. This is my feeble attempt at zeroing in on a few of the major joy killers in the life of a mommy and then how to fight for the joy God intended.

It seems to me in my life anyway that there are 4 biggies:

1. We do not meditate deeply on the love of God.

2. We allow our culture to give us our view of children rather than the word of God.

3. We neglect to raise them for God His way.

4. Pride.

For more go here.



Contest reminder

Moms, mom, and a mother…

In honor of Mother’s Day, I would like to share some heartfelt memories and appreciations of some of the moms in my life as well as some of my own joys of motherhood.



I'll start with my memories…

Firstly, my mom (Susan) came to Christ about 6-7 years ago and ever since she is always trying to focus her mind all the more on Christ. She is currently living with my family. She loves to help us through encouragement, generosity, supporting us as parents, and especially through prayer, prayer, and more prayer. She is a huge blessing to me.


Secondly, my mom-in-law is my friend and a really fun person to be with. Ruth has loved me like a mom ever since I married her youngest son. She welcomed me with open arms into her life and heart. She is spunky and we laugh a lot together… especially at scrapbooking weekend getaways!


Thirdly, my step-mom Becky… we’ve had some hard times, but I remember how special she made me feel at an awkward age. I was 13 years old and had just started menstrating for the first time. As the youngest of 4 girls (plus 1 older brother), I was sort of overlooked in this new “adventure”. Becky said that since I was now a woman she would take me for a day of woman pampering. We went to the local cosmetology college and got our hair cut and styled, a facial and a manicure… because we were “women!” I always smile when I think of that great day we had together and her kindness in making a curse into a blessing for a day!


Lastly, my foster mom… Sherry. She was warm and stable when my life seemed to be in much upheaval. She affectionately called me Sue-Sue. I remember how she always sang so beautifully. She died a few years back and was very lovingly remembered by all who knew her.


I'll finish with my own joys of motherhood....

Now that I’m a mom of 3 boys, I can better appreciate the care and love that was shown to me by my “moms”. However, I have to say that I think it’s easier to for me to be a mom than it was for me to be a kid. The biggest difference is that I didn’t have Jesus when I was a kid, but now I do, so life is filled with joys that even childhood couldn’t begin to compare with. I have such joy in knowing Jesus and telling my boys about Him. I have such joy in seeing God at work in my home life and my boys’ lives. I am filled with hope for the future as I see God’s word producing fruit in my children’s lives and as my children are used to teach me more about God! I praise God for His Holy Spirit’s guidance of my husband and I in the raising of our boys, as well as for bringing godly men and women to us to teach us about parenting when our oldest was still a baby! Motherhood has been a blessing from God because of how it brings me back to God. I am so thankful to be a mom and for my moms. Happy Mother’s Day Moms!

This Age

In But not Of

The fact that you’re reading this blog and I wrote it for you to read, shows the times and age we live in. It is a stretch for me to be doing this, this is a girl that only until recently began to venture into the blog hemisphere. The extent of my internet surfing encompassed sending e-mails, paying bills, checking out the news, and balancing my bank account. I feel we’re living in the Hellenization (spread of the Greek language, culture, and religion throughout the Middle East and Central Asia.) The spreading of the gospel was made possible across the region because they all spoke the same language. Our common language, in this case, is of course the internet. It is amazing to me how we can use this avenue to reach out literally to people from all over the place, if God is willing. As Christians we are called to live in this world, and not be of this world. The internet has been used, as we all know, in more evil ways than we can imagine, but using it to glorify God and exhorting others to do so, is a privilege I’m blessed to be part of. So I decided to come out of my cave and expand my idea of serving and spreading the gospel.

In the section of our blog called “THIS AGE” you shall see issues of life that this world throws at us or Satan uses to rob the joy and sufficiency in Christ that we feel. We hope to challenge you as well as ourselves in the many areas that pertain to our everyday life which could really include anything from the clothes we wear, to the things we eat, the movies we watch (or not), the music we listen to, and of course the people we vote for to lead this country…

To give a token of what we’re talking about and keeping with the Mother’s motif, I found this thought provoking article in the Kenosha News (April 29, 2008). It was entitled "Sacrifice: An American Virtue on Rebound". While the article argued that Americans are sacrificing more, though they don’t recognize it as that, our government and leaders keep avoiding asking people to sacrifice more. Nevertheless, government data shows that people are volunteering at historical rates and that whether we’re asked to …”join the military, feed the poor, conserve energy…", the next president is likely to find the most receptive audience since John F Kennedy’s “ask not” address…”. He goes on to quote people about what they think of the sacrifices they’ve made; one says “I think there’s something in each of us which wants to make things better for other people….I get more out of this than what I give—by a longshot.” That sums up the article, it starts with man and it ends with man—no thought of God and that is how the world works.

What in the world does this have to do with Moms you may ask yourself? Motherhood comes with a great deal of sacrifice. Physical sacrifices are the name of the game, just ask a new mom. Our bodies change never to be the same again, sleeping eight hours straight is a thing of the past, and the list goes on. But more than that, moms (myself included) are far too often, willing to sacrifice truth for a lie. In I Samuel 15:22, God tells us what He thinks about sacrifices “…to obey is better than sacrifice..”. Too often, we buy into the lies of this world that define what we should be doing, for the sake of gratifying ourselves. It may be a shopping spree, a makeover, or giving all our time and energy to our jobs, when our time should be spent at home caring, teaching, and correcting our children. While I was writing this piece, I had a deadline and was trying to meet it, but this time my kids kept needing me to break up “selfish fights”, refill their sippy cups yet again, and to make things worse; my littlest got behind the computer desk and turned off the computer. Yeah, I lost most of my article. I disciplined him, but then I realized that my job was to care for these guys first and if God wanted me to do this blog, He would have to provide a way for me to do it. And He did.

There are a million ways we can sacrifice our God given role and responsibilities in the name of a “good cause”, but as I was reminded: to obey is far more honoring to God than to make sacrifices…. Let me ask you Moms, what sacrifices are you making today that are keeping you from obeying God first?

A Tribute to My Mom

I am truly thankful for my mom. She is the toughest person I know. I have watched her endure many God ordained trials where she has suffered much heartache. With humble dependence on God, she has always come through these times, a bit sweeter and more dignified. My mom, Shelly Smith, was truly the glue that held the family together while we were growing up. She raised 5 children and we're all still alive, which is really saying something! LOL

I am especially grateful for the fact that my mom preached the gospel to us everyday. I could fill page after page with what my mom did for me during my childhood. Her influence and care hasn't stopped; it continued to this day.

My mom plays a very integral role in my daily life. This woman loves me despite the fact that she now has to put up with me on a daily basis as an adult rather than a kid under her authority. She now helps me take care of my own family! She has often sacrificed her own comforts and desires in order to care for my children, giving me opportunities to minister and be ministered to in ways that would otherwise be impossible. Her ministry to me and my husband Rick is immeasurable.

My mom lives a life of service. It's not just what she does, it's who she is! Jesus did not come to be served but to serve! She follows Jesus, therefore she serves! She serves her parents, by taking them to appointments and picking up prescriptions; this woman even runs errands last minute for a daughter (such as myself) who forgets to take a meal over to someone! She tries to always do what is most beneficial for the whole family rather than what is most convenient for her. Lord willing I too will be like this someday.

Mom, I am glad you are a part of our daily lives. I am thankful for the influence that you have and how good you treat my kids. I hope my life is an honor to you and I hope my children's lives will be an honor to you. Mom, your life has far more influence than you know. I love you, thank you for everything.

Characteristics of a Mom

Good Morning! The girls and I decided to start our blog out with a series on motherhood. We thought it appropriate with Mother’s Day right around the corner. Since I am the only member of our group not a mother, I opted to write my blog on three important characteristics of mothers as taught in Scripture. There are many others, but in interest of time I will only deal with the three I personally consider to be most important.

First, Jesus taught that the most important command in all the Bible was to “Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your mind and with all your strength.” It is important that mothers love the Lord most – even more than they love their children. This love needs to be evident to others. I can remember, as a little girl, watching as my mom asked my younger sister, “Who do you love most?” “You!” my sister cried, wrapping her chubby arms around my mother’s neck. “I love you too,” my mom whispered, hugging her back, “But I love God most, and so should you.” This was an everyday occurrence growing up. My mom didn’t just talk to us about God, but she daily lived out this love in front of her children and I cannot speak to the value this has been to us.

Second, mothers should faithfully preach the gospel to their children. I am reminded of Timothy, whose mother and grandmother were faithful to preach to him the Word of God as he was growing up and the impact that this had on him. Never underestimate the power of Scripture on your children’s lives. One of my favorite stories to tell mothers as they become discouraged is the story of John Newton, author of the famous hymn Amazing Grace. As an adult, Newton worked on a boat as a slave trader. His job was to kidnap people and bring them to different countries to be sold as slaves. As a young man, he was very proud of the sins that he had committed. He even used to brag that there was no sin that he had not committed. For entertainment, his shipmates used to sit around and try to think of sins that he hadn’t yet committed and if one was ever found, Newton set out to do it at the earliest possible time. One day there was a terrible storm while they were at sea. It was so terrible that all on board, including Newton, despaired for their lives. In the midst of his terror, Newton suddenly remembered verses that his mother had taught him as a young boy. As the waves crashed against the boat, Newton repented of his sins and turned to Jesus as his Savior. Later, remembering his salvation, Newton wrote Amazing Grace. Mothers, never be discouraged when you are teaching your children. Hebrews 4:12 says, “For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart.”

Lastly I would like to say that it is important to delight in your children and not to look at them as a burden. The Bible declares that children are a gift from God and it is important that mothers treat their children as though this verse is true. After God and her husband, there is nothing in this world that my mom loves more than her children. I have absolute confidence that she would die for any one of us without a moment’s hesitation. This has been such a huge blessing in my own life and I cannot imagine life without it. If the rest of the children in the world are anything like me, then they are rarely very easy to live with, making a mother’s love a true blessing.

My own mother has excelled in all three of these areas. I love her so much and she has had a hugely positive impact on my life. I can only urge you to love the Lord, faithfully preach the gospel to your children, and delight in your children. As they grow up, they truly will “rise up and bless [their mother]” as I have.