When you don't think you can endure "that"....

A few weeks ago I had a problem with my leg that was broken so badly. Its been almost 3 years since the original injury, but there have been so many complications I was told I would always have trouble.

In our backyard the ground is very uneven and there were many large tree roots. My husband and I were doing some yard work there and when we finished, I realized that my leg was very sore. Then I remembered that the surgeon warned me that at the point where the strong metal plate on the bone ends and the remaining unprotected bone continues, there is an area that can easily be cracked. I thought about how uneven the ground had been and realized that I may have actually cracked the bone. I felt a sick feeling come over me.

I decided to just stay off of it as much as I could and put ice on it and see if it would feel better the next day. But, when I woke up the next morning and got out of bed, I felt that same, sickening pain. I was afraid that I had really broken it again and I just told God that I didn't think I could deal with more trouble with my leg.

I quickly realized what I had said. I wasn't willing to yield to God's will, I just wanted things my way. I wasn't willing to persevere through that trial. I also realized that I was trying to do things in my own strength again, and not relying on God's strength.

Thankfully, the Lord didn't allow that particular trial into my life. My leg is getting better. But, I sure did have an awakening and God showed me these sins in my life so I could repent and change my thinking. God is good!

Thank God for "normal days"

I read an interesting quote by Gloria Gaither yesterday: "Thank God for normal days - there are far to few of them"

For me lately, my days have been busy and stressful. It seemed like I didn't have a moment to think. Those kinds of days are filled with prayer. But, on a rare occasion, I do have days that are relaxing and I have time to think and read and putter around the house.

I have realized that when I am having one of those rare "normal days" my thoughts are not on God as much as they are on hard days.

I encourage you to thank God for normal days and chaotic days. Either way, God is in control and He only allows what is best for us to happen.

Eager looks, tear-filled eyes, pleadings for one more chapter, laughter and breaks to talk - that is what reading classical literature has done in my children. We have read through books like The Secret Garden, Black Beauty, Swiss Family Robinson, and Call of the Wild.

The latest, Call of the Wild, has been filled with anxious looks and tears, mostly as we have read of the depths of the cruelty and depravity of man and beast.

As we were reading the other day, something struck me - I am getting more out of it then I am certain the author intended.

As we read of a family coming from the gentle Southland to the harsh Arctic for adventure and to search for gold without a clue how to live and survive, thinking entirely too highly of themselves, relying on their own wisdom, and neglecting the counsel of those who have lived, loved, lost, and knew the terrain, many things flooded my mind. As we read on, we experienced with this family their hardships, and cringed as we saw what the 'toil of trace and trail' made them. The author (Jack London) said, "The wonderful patience of the trail which comes to men who toil hard and suffer sore, and remain sweet of speech and and kindly did not come to these two men and the woman." Oh did it strike my heart! What has '"trace and trail', or trials, and wrongs done to me, produced in me?

Has it produced the complaining, argumentative, angry, and bitter spirit it produced in these people?

Or, has God produced the inner beauty that is precious to him? That of a gentle and quiet spirit? A strength produced that stands firm, unshaken in times of trouble? Is my joy and peace founded upon The immortal, invisible, God only wise? The One as Romans 5:2 says, "through whom also we have obtained our introduction by faith into this grace in which we stand; and we exult in hope of the glory of God."

These verses came racing to my head:

James 2:2-3 Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.

1 Peter 1:6-8 In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials,

so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ; and though you have not seen Him, you love Him, and though you do not see Him now, but believe in Him, you greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory,

As I continued to contemplate the dangers and tribulations that this family endured that produced bitterness, strife, foolishness and ultimately their death. I took stock of the little I have suffered in my life and began to cry out to My heavenly Father, who is the only one who can refine me, my heart, my speech, my character.

Next week I would like to share with you the thoughts, and talks about wisdom and the gospel I had with my children that this unlikely book produced.

Power in Weaknesses

In my Sunday school class we just learned about God’s promise to reward those who persevere in trials for the sake of Christ. It was a fantastic and encouraging lesson and, as always, God seems to bring my lessons in such a timely fashion in ministering to me! In preparing for my lesson I read these verses:

2 Corinthians 12:9-10 But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

I’ve read these verses many times before but they were especially convicting this time. The word “delight” is what really caught my attention. Paul didn’t say that he puts up with trials, insults, hardships, persecutions, difficulties, etc… he said that he delights in them. That’s just not normal! If somebody insults me or treats me badly, I don’t delight in it - I get angry. I steam inside and wish a lightning bolt would just zap them and teach them not to mess with me. But Paul says that he delights in it… ? So I re-read the verses and here’s what I think: Paul has seen the power of God through Christ’s work. He has experienced the power of Christ in himself and he wants more. He has a choice to either give in to his own flesh in times of trials (in my case this looks like angry silence, pouting, etc.) or to look to Jesus and see His glory, to trust in His work, and then taste of His power. He has tasted of the goodness of the Lord in every aspect of his life including Christ’s power in, over, and through his trials and afflictions… and as such when Paul is in a situation where he is in a position of weakness, he delights because he knows that Jesus has the power and will fill Paul with His strength. Paul would rather be filled with the presence and power of Jesus Christ through his own weaknesses and trials, then seek to give in to his own flesh to be free of the trials and hardships.

Psalm 16 puts words to the heart attitude expressed by Paul in the above passage, and is my prayer as I fight for joy in Christ in the midst of trials.

Psalm 16

Preserve me, O God, for I take refuge in You. 2 I said to the LORD, "You are my Lord; I have no good besides You."

3 As for the saints who are in the earth, They are the majestic ones in whom is all my delight. 4 The sorrows of those who have bartered for another god will be multiplied; I shall not pour out their drink offerings of blood, Nor will I take their names upon my lips.

5 The LORD is the portion of my inheritance and my cup; You support my lot. 6 The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places; Indeed, my heritage is beautiful to me.

7 I will bless the LORD who has counseled me; Indeed, my mind instructs me in the night. 8 I have set the LORD continually before me; Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.

9 Therefore my heart is glad and my glory rejoices; My flesh also will dwell securely. 10 For You will not abandon my soul to Sheol; Nor will You allow Your Holy One to undergo decay.

11 You will make known to me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; In Your right hand there are pleasures forever.

Trusting God

Romans 8:32 "He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things?"

This week in Sunday School, my class and I discussed trusting God in all circumstances. As usual, the lesson I was teaching served to convict me as I studied and prepared to present it. I read many verses, such as the one above, and was struck over and over again by the fact that the only part of me that it lasting is my soul. The only part of me that is eternal is my soul. The most important and valuable part of me is my soul.

And I have trusted Jesus to save my soul.

How can I not freely trust Him with all other things?

If you are anything like me, you struggle with worry and anxiety on a daily basis. It can be something as small as worry that you won't arrive to class on time (even though you left the exact same time you do every day, and every day you arrive fifteen minutes early) or something as big as a health issue that is getting worse or a personal financial crisis.
If you are anything like me, you find yourself worrying about these things as though God does not have any control over them, or as if God has control but lacks the time or willingness to act. We need to be daily reminding ourselves to trust in God. Because, if we truly believe that He has given us His own Son to die for us to save us from our sins - then how much more will He freely provide for our needs!

Luke 12:6-7 "Are not five sparrows sold for two cents? Yet not one of them is forgotten before God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows."

There are a myriad of ways that we can apply this to our daily lives. I will list a few of them here for your (and my) consideration and prayer:
1. Do you trust God enough to submit to your husband/father even when you disagree?
2. Do you trust God enough to respond to those around you in a loving manner?
3. Do you trust God enough to love others without being sure of receiving love in return?
4. Do you trust God enough to witness to friends, co-workers, and family?
5. Do you trust God enough to stand up for those being mistreated?
6. Do you trust God enough to do the right thing even in situations where you could get in trouble, made fun of, etc.?

A Modern Day Parable about Life and Trials…

Once there were two ladies: Ruthie and Sue Sue. Ruthie’s husband bought them new carpet as did Sue Sue’s husband. Both ladies were so thrilled with their new carpet that they had many friends and family over to see their new carpets and share in their excitement.

Ruthie was so pleased with her carpet, that she vacuumed it often and tried to keep it nice and clean. Ruthie welcomed visitors into her home and showed her guests her fine new carpet and they all were very happy for her. On one particular day Ruthie had some family over and during desert, a small child dropped chocolate ice cream on her new carpet. “Hmmm…” said Ruthie, as all stopped in a panic at the potential damage done to her fine new carpet, “Don’t worry. I’ll clean it up!” And off she went to get a rag. She worked for a little while and cleaned it up as best as she could, but then she decided that the carpet could wait and she enjoyed her guests. Often times, as Ruthie and her husband enjoyed guests, spills and accidents would happen but each time Ruthie took it all in stride and cleaned up the mess. Over time, Ruthie learned by necessity how to clean up all sorts of stains and spills in order to keep her carpet looking clean. And the skills that she had learned through cleaning up the spills and messes on her carpet actually allowed her to be able to help other ladies who had spills and stains on their carpets, too!

Sue Sue was so fond of her carpet that she would stand around looking at it and thinking how magnificent her carpet was and how diligent she would be to take good care of it so that it would always look as good as new. To that end, Sue Sue came up with a plan. She decided that the best way to keep her carpet clean and free of stains was to not let careless people eat on it and to not let anyone walk on it with wearing shoes. Sue Sue also welcomed guests into her house and showed them her fine new carpet. They were very happy for her. One day a guest was over and since this person was a very careful person, Sue Sue allowed them to eat in the room with her new carpet. However, her guest accidentally dropped her plate and spilled food all over the fine new carpet. Sue Sue immediately gasped and went to work cleaning up the mess. It was a nasty red spill and Sue Sue worked hard and long to prevent any possible stains to her wonderful carpet. She even forgot about her guest in all of her effort. After a while she sighed with relief as she had gotten out most of the stain, and it was hardly visible; but she resolved to be even more careful about who she let come into contact with her beautiful (slightly stained) carpet. Through the years, Sue Sue was ever vigilant and kept “would-be-carpet-stainers” at bay; but it seemed that accidents still happened and her carpet would get dirty. When those things happened Sue Sue did her best to clean the carpet, but she really didn’t have much experience with taking care of stains and so her efforts weren’t always very effective. Sometimes she would call Ruthie and ask her for carpet cleaning advice.

At the end of ten years, Sue Sue was over at Ruthie’s house and she noticed how fine Ruthie’s carpet looked. She had watched Ruthie clean up many spills and stains (even some of Sue Sue’s!) and so she wondered at how curious it was that after all of Sue Sue’s efforts to keep her carpet clean and lovely; that in the end, all of the spills on Ruthie’s carpet, along with her diligence and persistence in learning how to clean up those messes , had kept Ruthie’s carpet looking cleaner and more lovely than Sue Sue’s. She also noted that Ruthie was relaxed and hospitable to her guests, putting them at ease when accidental spills happened, rather than escalating their panic and embarrassment, like Sue Sue unintentionally did when her guests (or children) spilled on her carpet. And in this Sue Sue learned something and grew wiser. Accidents will happen, no matter how hard we work to prevent them or how well we try to maintain our carpet. The important thing is to not see the spills as something to be afraid of and hostile toward, but see them as an opportunity to grow and learn more about carpet cleaning and maintenance.

Similarly: We can desire our life to work out in a particular way so strongly that we fight against the trials and changes that God brings our way, rather than learning and growing through them. And in the end, it is the person who has weathered the storms and submitted to the Lord and His lessons, who turns out to have more peace, contentment and joy in the Lord!