Joy and trust in the Lord

I have been asking God lately to show me how to have joy in my heart and to help me to trust in Him more.  Ever since I have been meditating on the Gospel, I have realized that the problem is that I won't allow myself to feel joy and I am ok with trusting God with my soul but not in my day to day life.  Wow, what am I thinking???   I have been buying into a lie that if I give into the joy in my heart and let it show in my life, that somehow I will "be sorry".  I think that in my mind I am afraid that I will be disappointed or persecuted.  But that is stupid because everyone likes a joyful person.  Not allowing myself to be joyful is only making me unhappy.  I am trying to speak the Gospel to myself every time I feel the need to repress joy.  When I think of all God has done for me, I feel joy and now I just need to give into the feeling and be joyful.  After all, God says to be joyful.   I have also been buying into a lie that it is OK to trust in the Lord for the biggest thing--salvation, but its not OK to trust Him for small things that come up in day to day life.  That is stupid too.  I have found that I am very self-sufficient.  I'm sure you have heard "if you want something done right, do it yourself" - that's me.  But this way of thinking is wrong because the Bible says that I can do nothing without God's help.  I need to bring my cares to the Lord, even little ones that I figure He has more important things to take care of.  He is aware of everything going on in my life and He cares about it all and desires to help me.  He wants my best.  I think when I try to do things myself, it makes God sad because He wants me to ask for help.   If I keep looking at the Gospel and realize how much God loves me and that He promises to provide for my needs, I think I will be able to change.  I don't need to concern myself with God having more important things to do than help me with my puny troubles.  He is big enough to handle it all.  He loves me and wants whats best for me.  I can trust Him.  I can let the joy of the Lord fill my soul and life.  I can be free in the Lor