Wants, Contentment, and God’s Perfect Plan

My husband is a carpenter. Up until recently he had a great paying job for a union company. He was getting 40 hrs each week and things in our little “financial world” were looking good. But not quite two months ago, Ryan was laid off because his company didn’t have enough work for all of their employees. Ryan has been applying at different union contractors, but they all seem to have a shortage of available work. This change in Ryan’s employment may be temporary but it shows us how quickly our finances can change, which in turn causes us to be wary of any future plans which would increase our expenses such as house sales, and purchases, etc. We have a nice house that we’ve been fixing up in hope of selling (and moving far away from our current neighborhood) with dreams of building our own home… the DREAM home. I had given much thought and spent long hours planning and dreaming about where we could build, what lot to purchase, what type of house to build, which floor plan to choose, etc. So as I look over our current situation and then look to the future, I must consider the possibility that my worldly dreams may never come true. Why do I mention all of this? Well, because God is using this time and these particular “trials” to show me what’s in my heart.

Let me just say right up front that God is providing for our needs. Our bills are paid each month and we are well fed. We have many encouraging friends who pray for us and show Christian concern and brotherly kindness all the time. Yet I see in my heart a sadness at the prospect of giving up my dream of moving and building our dream house, along with the pleasant feeling of a steady (if not inflated) income. I know in theory that God’s plan for us is what’s best but it’s times like these when our application of those truths is tested that I find myself less than joyfully accepting of God’s will. I am sure that one reason God has brought these trials into our lives is to show me my heart and it’s idols, so that I may tear them down and offer up my whole self (including my desires, dreams and plans) to the Lord for His glory. It’s not as easy as it sounds, though.

I spend so much time thinking “wouldn’t it be great if…” or “I would love to…” that I have to pull back and re-orient myself to the present tense. I need to spend less time dreaming about what could be (in the “American dream” sense) and more time being thankful for the things that are. I need to start really believing in my heart, not just in my words, that whatever God gives to me is the absolute best thing for me and that whatever He withholds from me, is because it was NOT good for me (at least not yet). I also need to be careful to not focus on the future too much, thinking that I know how God will work out my tomorrow based upon what’s happening today. Today, God may have said “No” but that doesn’t mean that He’ll always say “No”. He gives me the best thing for today, which may not be the best thing in two years. I need to trust Him to work out the details and to do it all well. I need to take seriously the call to keep my eyes focused on heavenly things and my feet firmly grounded in today, for each day “has enough trouble of its own”. Matthew 6:33-34

Let me end with the thought that reassures me. If God is so excellent as to plan something as wonderful as salvation for a person so undeserving as me, then He can certainly be trusted to work out a wonderful and excellent design for my daily life. Or, to put it another way, “He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things?” Romans 8:32. So though I may be temporarily sad over what appears to be the loss of my “dream”, I can be much more permanently happy knowing that however God blesses us, it will be better than I could have ever planned. I just have to look with eyes of faith to see it!