Witty Wednesdays

Here's some belated Father's Day Humor for you all.

A company held a contest for kids with the theme: "The nicest thing My Father Ever Did For Me." One kid answered "He married my mother." ~~~~~~~

In the frozen foods department of our local grocery store, I noticed a man shopping with his son. As I walked by, he checked something off his list, and I heard him whisper conspiratorially to the child, "You know, if we really mess this up, we'll never have to do it again." ~~~~~~~

Did You Know?
There are more collect calls on Father's Day than any other day of the year. An estimated $1 billion is spent each year in the United States for Father's Day gifts, but Dad is still paying the bill when it comes to telephone calls from the kids. ~~~~~~~

Fathers Day Quotes
Bill Cosby:
If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.

Fathers Day Quotes
John Aubrey: "Sir Walter, being strangely surprised and put out of his countenance at so great a table, gives his son a .... blow over the face. His son, as rude as he was, would not strike his father, but strikes over the face the gentleman that sat next to him and said, "Box about: twill come to my father anon." (In more modern words: you slap the guy next to you and keep it going around the table... it'll come around to my father, but it won't have been me that hit him)